Clarification of excogitation 1 . 12 . 00
This was a response to Betty, who commented on my excogitation post.
I know it may seem impossible, as my thoughts seem incredibly scattered these days. Can't stand what they're doing to Manny one day, and asking people to accept them the next. I'll just blame that on my multiple personalities :P But in all seriousness, I think my true feelings have been muffled somewhere in between.. and on any given day, I can rant and rave about one against the other with every fiber of my being believing what I say. That's something that my little brain has to wrap itself around, and I'll try not to subject you all to my schizophrenic state too much in the future. I really, really, really, really (I just don't know if I can stress this enough, because I have a feeling it will be misconstrued somewhere down the line)... I really agree with you and everyone else who say that Manny have not been used TO THEIR POTENTIAL. The people on here who really know me.. know how deeply Manny has effected my life and my heart. I do realize how special they are (as a couple and as individual characters), not just to me, but to everyone - and to daytime. They ARE that unique couple that comes around once a generation - I so couldn't agree more. :) And I'm as angered as you and everyone else that they have not been given a BETTER STORY than what they have now. Where people misunderstood my praising Manny the other day in my post was my own fault. I failed to explain my feelings more in depth. I want Manny in any other storyline right now - ANYTHING other than this Ben Murder stuff. I really do. When I commented about Manny "themselves", I simply was referring to the one on one connection that, to me, is as brilliant as ever - due solely to PAS and JL. As characters, they're being used to prop up a ludicrous storyline. But specifically as Manny, they still have the power to move me... to engulf me in their gazes, their touches, the love that seeps out of every whisper and tear. This is, at times, more powerful than any disappointment I feel about where they're going on the SF canvas. And for that, I sometimes feel guilty that I should be more disappointed when I'm happy with them. And the same is true the other way around.. I feel guilty for being disappointed when I see that there is so much to be happy with (and there really is a lot, when it comes down to it). These two viewpoints cause an immense amount of conflict in my head and heart.. something that I haven't been able to come to terms with on a daily basis while watching them lately. Yes, it sounds very melodramatic, and yes, I know they're just a "fictional couple", but Manny, and all they embody, mean so much to me that I can't even form the words to explain it to any of you. For that, I'm sorry... I keep trying, but I don't think I'm able to elucidate my thoughts right now. You're so right. It's backstage politics that are hurting everyone. Not just Danny and Michelle, but us, the viewers. And it pains me to see people on this board, in a way, blame or tear down the characters themselves because of it. (Disclaimer: this is not a personal attack - it's the general feeling of the board these days - and, of course, my own personal opinion) I see people feeling the need to take sides on issues when we're all here to love and support the same two people. For fear of ticking off SOMEBODY (though, isn't that just bound to happen anyway? :P).. I love reading everyone's different points of view. I adore this board, and all the people on it. I've met the most amazing people here.. so please take my comments as they were meant - with love. :) In conclusion, I seriously and unabashedly have no idea what to think. My mood changes from day to day where Manny is concerned. Love, sadness, fear, excitement, anticipation... it's all there for me on a daily basis. Wow, I guess the feelings that Manny used to evoke from me haven't left. :) Hugs to all.. Candy
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